Posts Tagged ‘Republican’

” Look here, Faylene. I done made a sign what tells how I feel!”

BONNERS FERRY (LDPK News Affiliate) – Visitors to a Bonners Ferry, Idaho town hall meeting were met with a strange sight on Friday, when self-identifying Tea Party Libertarians agreed to—and did—take a stand for Obamacare.  Even more surprising was the method of conveying the message: paid advertising spots tattooed on the actual bodies of the Tea Partiers.

According to an unnamed Democratic Party operative, nine high-ranking members in the Idaho Citizen’s Reform Action Party (“ICRAP”)—the local manifestation of the Tea Party in Bonners Ferry—were paid an undisclosed sum to have one letter of the word “Obamacare” tattooed across each of their chests.  The letters, in Book Antigua font and tattoo green, ranged in size from twelve to twenty-four inches in height, depending on the girth of the bearer.  When instructed by operatives, the ICRAP leaders arranged themselves in the proper order in the middle of the crowd, spelling their message and enraging and confusing the other attendees at the meeting.

“I didn’t think they’d actually do it,” stated one of the operatives in charge of coordinating the raucous display of free speech.  “Apparently, a hundred bucks and a box of hollow point bullets goes pretty far with this crowd,” continued the operative.  When reminded that the operative had previously stated that he would not reveal the amount paid to each ICRAP member, the operative replied that “well, stuff happens . . . I mean they got everything they wanted.  We had over $100,000 budgeted for this operation, and all they asked for were the bullets.”  “We kinda gave them the money out of pity,” finished the operative.  “I threw this idea out as a joke one day, when things were a little crazy in the office after we got a hold of some bad Vietnamese food.  These guys took it to a whole new level.”

The members of ICRAP involved in the protest would not identify themselves for the purposes of this story, though “O” offered several comments as an unofficial spokesperson for the group.  “No I don’t feel like a sell-out,” stated O, “because I’m a libertarian.  My body is my property, and I should be able to sell it to someone else if I want to.  That’s the beauty of the free market: I sold my body to the highest bidder.”  When asked if he was troubled that he was “bought” by the Democratic Party, an organization generally considered to be the polar opposite of the Tea Party, O replied: “well that part kind of sucked, but they paid for it.  It’s not my job to tell them what to do with their property.”  Unprompted, O stated that he would “look like the rear quarter-panel of Kyle Busch’s car if somebody’d hook me up with some tickets to a Sarah Palin book signing.  I love what she has to say about politics, but she needs to learn how to respond to my letters.”

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